Have you ever read a product description, social media post, or flyer that felt… well, lifeless? You probably moved on without a second thought, right? Here's the thing: the words you choose in your marketing or business writing can either hook your customers or send them scrolling away. One of the biggest culprits behind dull, uninspiring business writing is the sneaky passive voice.
Passive voice hides who’s responsible, makes your message weaker, and drains the energy out of your promotions. But don’t worry—you’re not alone Most writers and many small business owners struggle with this and don’t even realize it! In this article, you’ll learn how to spot passive voice in your emails, flyers, and social media posts, plus how to flip the script with clear, compelling active sentences that connect with your audience and drive action.
Let’s dive in and give your business writing the spark it deserves!
Writing in Passive Voice
I use Grammarly to polish up my blog posts' grammar and spelling before sending them to my client. While I commit several common errors, the worst one I commit is writing in the passive voice—and I am not alone in this. So, what is passive voice?
Passive voice happens when the sentence focuses on what happened instead of who did it. Imagine you're telling someone about an event, and you're more interested in the action than who made it happen. It's kind of like saying: "The cake was eaten." You're not telling us who ate the cake—just that the cake is gone!
Here’s how it works, along with other examples related to small businesses. Notice which ones read more clearly and instill more confidence in the reader.
Emails:
Passive: Your inquiry will be responded to within 48 hours.
Active: We will respond to your inquiry within 48 hours.
Flyers/Promotional Material:
Passive: A free consultation will be offered to all new clients.
Active: We offer a free consultation to all new clients.
Advertisements:
Passive: Special discounts are offered on bulk purchases.
Active: We offer special discounts on bulk purchases.
Product Descriptions:
Passive: This product was designed to meet your needs.
Active: We designed this product to meet your needs.
Social Media Posts:
Passive: Updates will be posted weekly.
Active: We post updates weekly.
Customer Service Notices:
Passive: Your feedback has been noted.
Active: We have noted your feedback.
Website Copy:
Passive: Orders are shipped within 24 hours.
Active: We ship orders within 24 hours.
Why Passive Voice Can Be a Problem
Passive voice can be a problem in writing for a few reasons, especially when clarity and engagement are essential. Let’s look at some examples.
- It hides the subject (who or what is acting).
- Passive: The window was broken. (We don’t know who broke it.)
- Active: The kid broke the window. (Clear and direct!)
- If readers don’t know who is responsible for the action, they might get confused or lose interest -- and that defeats the purpose of writing.
- It can make writing wordy or awkward.
- Passive: The decision was reached after much discussion by the team.
- Active: The team reached the decision after much discussion.
- Passive sentences usually require more words, making your writing less concise. People typically prefer writers that get straight to the point.
- It weakens the message or makes it less engaging.
- Passive: Mistakes were made.
- Active: We made mistakes.
- The passive version sounds detached and impersonal, making your writing dull or unreliable. In contrast, the active version sounds like you’re actively taking responsibility.
- It can sound evasive or vague -- passive is sometimes used to avoid assigning blame:
- Passive: The rules were not followed. Who didn’t follow the rules? This kind of sentence leaves out important information.
- Active: Our team did not follow the rules.
- This sounds assertive and implies that someone is taking responsibility.
While the passive voice isn't always bad, overusing it can weaken your writing. The active voice is usually more substantial, more precise, and more engaging.
Passive Voice Isn’t Always Bad
Passive voice can be helpful sometimes, like if you don’t know who did something or you don’t want to say it. It can also work when you want to emphasize the action or when the actor isn’t essential. But most of the time, active voice is more precise and direct. Consider making it easy for your readers to know who's doing what when writing.
Advice
Some of the best advice I received about writing came from an elderly professor retiring from education research. He told me to eliminate the passive voice from my writing, and it would make a tremendous difference in how readers received it. The same advice applies to you, whether you’re writing a social media post about a new milestone your company has reached, an email addressing a problem with an unhappy client, or a blog post about how to pack your belongings for a move.
Conclusion
You’ve seen how passive voice can weaken your message and make your business writing feel flat. By switching to active voice, however, you create stronger, clearer communication that keeps your audience engaged.
But you don’t have to tackle this alone! If you’re ready to take your business writing to the next level, McCaslin Wordsmithing is here to help. From crafting compelling product descriptions to creating polished emails, we take the worry out of writing. Reach out today, and let’s start scaring up success for your small business!
Contact us now to discuss your next project. We’re ready when you are!
